Let me just start by saying:
Hi, I am The Hurricane Du and I love The Kardashians
I have read many negative opinion pieces on them, I know there are a lot of people out there who do not like the Kardashians and the way they have successfully flipped scandal after scandal into money making events, time and time again. But may I ask once again, who is perfect? Point me in the direction of a scandal free family so I can hold up a cross and sprinkle holy water on their lawn because clearly they are the real illuminati.
Season 12 does not hold back AT ALL. They jump in with a short intimate scene of Kim telling Kris her water has broken and baby Saint is on the way, well that is where I landed because I have this on DVR. Saint looks just like North, they show two quick pictures. Klhoe is slim and toned, but her ass is gigantic, not a bad thing, something tells me it’s exactly the size she wants it to be. Oh and I’m not tryin’ to hear that, she squatted that ass into existence shit, ya’ll can miss me with that. She looks great though, on this episode she’s furniture shopping for Lamar’s new house, and working through issues with Caitlyn (they’ve been fighting via text).
Scott still disappears for days.
A seemingly slowed down Scott has a new mansion somewhere in the hills. I rolled my eyes when he said it was ‘a bit’ lonely in his new big home. He fixed up the kids’ rooms and was working on learning how to cook with Kris, for the benefit of the kids of course, ’cause ya’ll know Kourtney is on her clean eating shit, she looks great though. Kourtney is super focused and I’m just happy for her, she’d smiling, she’s doing interviews, and she real life needed some freedom and a fresh start on life.
Everyone is mad at Rob.
Black Chyna’s name was mentioned several times. I’m picturing her grinning right now. This Black Chyna/Rob/Tyga/Kylie shit is messy as fuck. Chyna started out as Kim’s friend. They were just posting BFF selfies on IG not too long ago. Then I don’t know what transpires in boring lonely mansions, but Tyga, who has a son named King with Chyna, started fucking Kylie, Tyga confirmed it after Kylie turned 18. Everyone subbed everyone for a long time, except for Kim and then Rob came and dropped a nuclear bomb in that motherfucker, that has upstaged all Kardashian stunts. Not only does he start dating Chyna, he proposed to her, with a fat ass rock.
They still talk crazy to Kris.
Oh let’s all get into Kris reminding her kids who the fuck keeps this shit together and who is the brains behind this operation. Every now and then you have to snatch your kids by the collar and whisper through clenched teeth “I will still fuck you up”. That is basically what Kris did, but in white people’s parenting style. ‘You! Married 72 days. That’s normal?’, Kris jabbed at Kim. Kris just had to remind the girls, they make mistakes too, major ones and Rob is still her child, just like them.
“fair is fair” -Billy Jean
Don’t get me wrong, I talk my shit too, but I do really enjoy following this family and witness their many evolutions. They really remind me of a regular ass family, except they are rich. I don’t care if I’m that person who indulges in their brand of entertainment, I find them to be a fascinating family, they clearly love each other and I think it’s cool that they try so hard to stick together. Below is a promo for what you can expect to see this season:
-The Hurricane Du